בס''ד
Parshat VaYeshev
20 Kislev, 5772
December 16th,
2011
Among our most important teachers in rabbinical school were Ignacio Ojeda
and his staff, who ran the kitchen and the cafeteria. My guess is that they
were conscious of their role as unofficial professors, and their part in
turning aspiring rabbis, educators, undergrads, et al. in actual human beings,
even if they never outright said it.
Their coursework was simplicity itself: how to be kind to people, even when
working hard. They taught by example.
Coming into our cafeteria meant being greeted with a smile and by name,
questions about your family, and, in my case, constant teasing because you
weren’t married yet.*
I cannot overestimate how important those brief moments of kindness were.
They took a relationship which had the single, paltry virtue of being
functional, and raised it into a gift. It was a privilege to walk into their
dining hall.
The Talmud teaches in the name of Rabbi Helbo, who in turn heard it
from Rav Huna, that if you know a person will regularly greet you, you should
greet that person first. Not to do so is to be called a thief. Brakhot 6b
To paraphrase the Mesillat Yesharim, you don’t need me to tell you
that these words are true; everyone knows to be polite. But the truth of kind
greeting is so obvious that it is easily set aside. Therefore let us reminds
ourselves of what we already know.
Sometimes we assume that familiarity absolves us of the need for niceties.
Sometimes we believe that the business we have before us takes precedence over
personal connection. These conceits are very seductive, very convincing – we
have known each other for years, we have important matters to which we must
attend. These conceits are wrong.
Remember that everyone, literally everybody, needs to be seen for more than
their function. Remember that with kindness, everything is forgivable, without
it, little is acceptable. Remember that, in a spiritual community, there is no
more pressing business than kind connection.
*Please do not follow
their example!
I loved it. Shalom. Good Morning and thank you very much. It is so true......
ReplyDelete